I blog for my own personal benefit. I don’t even think I fit into a genre, with my posts about my dogs and my pregnancy and recipes and parties and outfits of the day and decorating my house…but these are the things that I want to look back on in 20 years and remember. So I write for myself.
Its nice that my family follows along. Its amazing that I’ve met so many other bloggers and followers, and many of whom I now consider friends. Blogging is a wonderful social networking tool, and the advice, suggestions, inspiration and thoughts I’ve received over the years have been so precious to me.
But, this is my own little corner of the world, and here, I can climb onto my soapbox any time I’d like. So here we go:
* I’m uncomfortable having my stomach touched. Yes, at least I’ve popped now, but I dislike having anyone else patting me. I’m not much of a hugger, I enjoy my personal space, and I don’t know why so many feel the need to rub me like a genie’s lamp. It’s weird.
* I spent over two years and a LOT of money to get pregnant. I am not going to jeopardize my health or Guinevere’s. That said, there are a million conflicting reports out there about what pregnant women can and cannot do, and I’ve made informed decisions for myself about how to handle what I eat and what I do. So that means that I do highlight my hair, I am enjoying deli meat on occasion, I’ve had a non-alcoholic beer, and I am not opposed to a glass of wine at the end of the third trimester. And, I will wear high heels as long as my center of balance can handle it. While one doctor (that I’d never met before) felt the need to lecture me, MY doctor, the one that GOT me pregnant, agrees that I should make this decision for myself.
* Tyler and I are Guinevere’s parents. We will make all decisions for her and regarding her until she is 18 years old. While others already feel the need to offer their opinions, please understand that while I’m smiling and nodding, I’ve already tuned you out. Tyler and I are intelligent, responsible, mature and rational. We’ve been a team for 12 years, and work together beautifully. We’re always on the same page. We got this.
* I don’t want anyone at the hospital while laboring, aside from Tyler. I think birth is a very private experience, and while we might text our parents and sisters to let them know that we are at the hospital, we expect them to follow our wishes to not intrude on that personal time. Basically, if you weren't present for the conception, then you certainly won't be present for the birth.
* Once Guinevere is born, Tyler and I will announce the birth to our parents and sisters, and probably our very best friends. And then, we want to bond with our daughter. This child is SO wanted by us, SO loved by us, and we’ve been anxiously awaiting her arrival for a very long time. We are desperate to spend time as a family. Not to mention, I want to figure everything out on my own. Breastfeeding and changing and soothing…I want Tyler and I to try to get a grasp on the situation before we are blasted by visitors. I don’t want an audience while we are transitioning to parenthood. Not to mention? I want a shower. I will be covered in afterbirth and sweat and god knows what, and I want a shower before people come in with their cell phone cameras and regular cameras and video cameras…shudder.
* Our families are considered equal. Yes, I will be the one to birth Guinevere, but Tyler is every bit my partner in this experience, and our parents and our sisters will be given the same opportunities to visit, not only as a newborn, but for the rest of her life. I do NOT want to referee these relationships. If someone thinks they are getting the short end of the stick, or that something isn’t fair, they can get over it. Tyler and I are VERY fair, and we love our families the SAME.
* And with the hospital visit in mind, please don’t be offended if we ask you to leave when we need to rest or feed her. We’ll have a lot going on, and we will definitely not be in the mood to entertain visitors. We will also ask EVERYONE to coordinate with Tyler before coming by…please don’t surprise us. Call or text and make sure it’s a good time. The same will go for visits when we are back at home. And don’t be salty when we say ‘no’ – its nothing personal.
* I’m going to ask you to wash your hands, and to use hand sanitizer in front of me before you may hold Guinevere. Yes, I believe that you just washed your hands. But humor me anyway. I’m a new mom, I’m sort of a germ freak anyway, just do it please.
Note: I have no issue with my dogs kissing her. Yes, that may sound strange, but the dogs were here first, long before Guinevere - and the dogs will continue to sleep in my bed EVERY night while Guinevere NEVER will. Since the dogs can kiss me anytime they want, then they can kiss their baby sister anytime they want. Just accept it.
* If I don’t know you, don’t touch my daughter. Yes, she is going to look absolutely precious in her stroller while we’re out at Target. But you’re a perfect stranger, and I have no idea where your hands have been. If I so much as see them sneaking up to touch her in any way, I’ll swat you so fast your head spins. Or maybe I’ll just touch your face.
Bottom line? I’ve never been laid back a day in my life. I’m uptight, a control freak, and incredibly OCD. I like things my way, and I have anxiety attacks when things don’t go as I plan. Just assume all of those traits will be magnified 10X in the first few weeks of her life…if not the first few years.
Hugs and kisses!
- A mom with completely reasonable requests.